Subconscious Mind and Development
How Experiences we Don't Remember Still Affect us
The unconscious mind is estimated to be responsible for around 95% of the information we use to function daily. That is to say that most of our reactions, decisions, and perspectives come from a web of information that we have likely completely forgotten, or never paid attention to to begin with.
The developing brain creates it’s network similarly to how paths are formed in a forest. The first time we walk a trail, it might be difficult and confusing. We may remember it if it was a crazy experience, or forget about it if it was nothing special. Whether we remember or forget, the path was still made, and the more times we walk it, the more clear-cut and familiar it becomes. At some point, it is an unconscious or autopilot decision to walk in that direction.
The photo above, taken from Cambridge University Press, shows the development of synapses (aka, the paths/ connections formed in the brain) as they develop between 0-2 years old. With each new observation, interaction, and experience a person has, new micro-networks form, creating our unconscious guidebook for perceiving the world. Once each new synapse has formed during development, it can strengthen or weaken depending on how often it is used.
Forming connections that regularly help us cope with familiar, social, and cultural environments will grow stronger throughout development. Those often-frequented and strong connections will stay in the brain throughout the lifespan, even after our environments change. Sometimes the information we collect as children no longer serves us as we grow up. Something that once protected us in our world as a child can result in fear responses or defense mechanisms that hinder us in adult life.
Cutting Connections
Connections in the brain may be weakened or broken completely by a process called synaptic pruning if they are not being used often, creating space for new, more useful connections. However, as the brain grows older, the process of removing connections slows substantially. Synaptic pruning is most common during early development.
So when does this process end?
The short answer is, never. Our brains continue to develop and change as we grow old, forming new connections and strengthening already existing ones.
The most influential times, however, are between 0-5 years old, and then again during adolescence or puberty. During these two time frames, the brain changes faster than at any other time. The things that we experience during those times are likely to have a stronger impact on us.
Habits and routines, social norms, communication, and attachment styles are a few examples of things likely to leave a strong mark.
Then, the brain’s development slows down substantially in the late 20’s. Changes in brain chemistry continue to happen after this time, but at a much slower pace than before.
So, am I like this forever?
As the brain ages, it takes more time for synaptic connections to form and to weaken. Patterns of thinking can feel permanent, and it is common to hear the phrase, “It’s how I am,” or “It’s just how they are,” when responding to criticisms about how we act. However the brain, like the body, is adaptable.
While it is not always possible to erase connections that hinder us after a certain point, new patterns can always be learned to contradict those unhelpful ones. With a conscious dedication to understanding why we react in some way, new dialogs can be practiced to negate the old ways of thinking.
Transformation away from unhelpful patterns of being is difficult to do alone, and an outside perspective can often help bring clarity to situations.
The tiniest moments that we do not even consider to be noteworthy end up making us who we are. Our observations and experiences impact how we think, react, and handle different situations throughout life. Sometimes, these connections are erased if they were not frequented too often in the past, but more importantly, new connections can always be made. How and when we were put to bed, how we were communicated with, and the patterns of our culture and society all fed into the unconscious guidebook for how we each uniquely perceive and react to the world today.
Sources:
Our Brains Reveal Choices Before We Are Even Aware of Them
The Potentials of the Subconscious Mind
Not Quite as Grown-Up as We Like to Think: Parallels Between Cognition in Childhood and Adulthood